On Monday night I couldn't sleep, I was a mess of anxious nerves. Tuesday morning was our ultrasound. I had no reason to be necessarily worried. After all, there are only an infinite number of problems that could happen when a person develops from one cell into the millions of cells that are present midway through pregnancy (note sarcasm).
I'm getting too old now. I know too much, and worry more than is healthy. People close to me have had difficult news at their ultrasounds. Twenty-something couples with happy hearts have lost their babies at birth, had their babies taken away at birth for major surgery, and have had spent the months after an ultrasound preparing their family for a special needs baby that will change life forever. This is so real to me now, it has hit too close to home too many times. No, ultrasounds aren't exciting for me anymore, they're terrifying.
Today, no news was good news, and I mean "no news" in the most anti-climatic way possible. At first glance, all seems well. We feel blessed and thankful for what we hope to be another beautiful, healthy baby. And, while I was hoping to do a big blogger announcement about our "baby boy," OR "baby girl," I swear, we still don't know! Baby is keeping him or herself covered for the moment, and we will left speculating for the time being exactly who we will be adding to the family this December.
I hope to rest better tonight, in gratitude for the beauty of life.